As we humans continue to pummel the walls of the social construct that harms the many and only profit a few, we can all agree that this shit is uncomfortable. Looking at and owning up to one’s privilege can be really gnarly because it’s in part a practice of being introspective and self-reflective and what is reflected back upon the self may be rather ugly and far from politically correct. Not as pure as one might have thought and covered with more blindspots than one might care to openly mention.
In short, it is a humbling experience.
For those newly on this journey I say, “welcome to the party” because those oppressed have had to live through the discomfort of being shamed on and off throughout their entire lifetimes. And I don’t say this to wag a finger at those who have blindly and systematically oppressed unintentionally or otherwise. I say this in observation of a simple fact: The self study that one has to perform over an entire lifetime to self-accept an identity that goes against a system that prefers an ideal, homogeneous “perfect” is an entire stream of existence and consciousness that is difficult and uncomfortable to live through. The very existence of one who is born as or chooses to live a reality that goes against the preferred norm is not easy.
That struggle should not be taken lightly. It’s a heavy weight to bear.
So for those in positions of privilege who choose to wake up, listen to, and learn from those with lived experiences different from themselves, these new feelings of general discomfort are a gift.
I promise it is though it may not seem like it now.
Discomfort is something that should be eased into with grace. It is an opportunity to humble the self. This discomfort is an empathy paper cut. It hurts like all heck when you get it, but it’s nothing more than a minor surface wound. This discomfort is just a fraction of the discomfort that your colleague of color might feel when sitting in a room of peers (they don’t have to be white) who are digging their heels into racist ideals during a diversity and inclusion forum knowing that after this talk s/h/xe still has to work with said colleagues but know in full knowledge that these individuals not only refuse to change but also harbor unacknowledged racist tendencies.
Paula Stone Williams said it beautifully in her Ted Talk. Just as a trans woman will never forget male privilege so long as she may live, she will spend the rest of her days learning more and more what it means to be a womxn in society. But one does not have to know first hand the discomfort, danger, and/or second class citizenship that comes from being a socially designated “other”, though it does help to bring the point home. Empathy and suspending injustice disbelief can take one genuinely committed to becoming a more compassionate human being far.
Said another way, if Eve and Adam had not eaten the fruit from the tree of knowledge of good and evil their innocent selves would not have died and their eyes would not have been open to the fact that they were shamefully nude. In this case, the ignorance, and resulting shame, of one’s nudity would be the state of not being aware of the prejudice patterns, habits, and beliefs that one has taken on as a bi-product of living in an unjust society in an unacknowledged position of privilege.
We all have privilege. We all have blind spots. We all act through a lens of prejudice in some way, shape, or form at some time or another. When one chooses to walk the path of the “woke”, listen to an alternate perspective, and consume knowledge that is contrary to the point of view of those in positions of power, one can choose to take on the gift of shame — shame at one’s past and present prejudice and hurtful behaviors and beliefs — with grace; or one can reject a newfound truth and continue to walk naked, shamelessly, in an ignorance that is no longer completely blissful.
Caia Rose 